Yes the time has come once again, the time where in we start rushing to the book store to buy school supplies and calling the school repeatedly to find out if class lists are out. Have you guessed it yet? That’s right, back to school season. 

I’m honestly excited, and nervous at the same time.

Excited, because I have this whole plan set up for the year. Which mainly focuses on studies and sports. And that’s a first for me. I usually shrug things like that off, but realizing that I need good grades to get to a good college, I started re-thinking my priorities. If you asked me what kind of student I’ve been for the previous years, I’d tell you that I was an average student,  but that would be a lie. As much as it pains me to say it, I’m a slacker. Yep. Barely listen to class, talk 24/7, cram before tests, and do my homework during homeroom. And I’d actually get away with okay grades. But I can’t be like that anymore, I need to start exerting effort now. I mean, imagine what I can do when I’m not actually studying, okay grades. But if I actually study and listen in class, who knows how far I’ll go? Aside from those things, I’m really gonna try to be more outgoing, haha. Meaning being more friendly and open to make friends with people. Changing for the better.

Nervous, because when summer’s over, everything comes rushing back. All the problems you left behind 3 months ago, come rushing back to you. And I know how pessimistic that sounds, but that’s how I see it.  I mean, seeing certain people and remembering who they were to you last year will just leave you thinking “what are we now? are we friends? or are we gonna ignore each other this year?” and I absolutely hate that. Not knowing where you stand with someone. Especially if that person was someone you were close with. And then of course, overthinking. Holding on to the past. Wishing it was where you were now. Contemplating weather or not different people still mean something to you. Wondering if you missed something that could have just changed everything all together. All of that will come rushing at you once we step into those school grounds. but whats a new school year without new arising problems to top off your old ones? Let’s all just hope for the best.

So many things just running through my head right now. Even though I have a plan for this school year, I simply don’t know how to go about this year. I am terrified. 

rant city at 3:15am oh the quirks of summer.

title is a line from Falling in love with my best friend by Matt White :)

Tell me a story, any story really. It could be about your life, your love life, your problems, your dreams, your thoughts on something. I’m here to listen. Everybody needs someone to rant to :) 

go on, I won’t bite :) click here to share your story.

Don’t you just hate it when you have a dream that just messes up your whole day? 

I had the best sleep I’ve had in a very long time. Being able to get to bed by 11 these days is quite an achievement for me. And it’s not like my dream was some kind of scary one. It was actually really good. But then I wonder why the hell I would dream something that hasn’t crossed my mind in such a long time. And the weird part that I’m contemplating on is weather or not I liked that dream or not… If I did, what would it mean? ugh. This is very very frustrating. 

I’m a big believer of signs, I really am. What if this dream was actually one of them? Or what if it was just a coincidence of having that person cross my mind, then so happened to just appear in my dream… just in a way that I never would have imagined.. UGH.

And thus, leading me back to the beginning of the never ending cycle of, have you guessed it yet? That’s right, overthinking. 

I honestly did not think that I would have any thing to overthink about this summer. Now one crazy dream just pops up in my head and such events happening to make me think it’s a sign rolls in and  fucks everything up.

Prepare for dramatic contemplating posts once again. (le sigh)

And if you’re wondering what song I got my title from it’s Walt Grace’s Submarine Test January 1967 from John Mayer’s new album, Born and Raised that a friend of mine pointed out to me. It’s  amazing :) 

Right now, I am currently listing down & downloading every single song from my favorite shows, movies, etc. and categorizing them into playlists. Movies are easy, but series? I’m putting quite an effort in doing this. I guess I just realized that I need to broaden my music and shit. and maybe have new songs to listen to as the summer comes to an end and the school year arises. 

its 3am. lets do this shit. 

…and most of us know how the rest of that line goes. totally relate-able 

Lately, I’ve realized that the more you listen to a song, the more you get the message of it. Why the artist wrote it. What his or her story was. And more than usual, you realize that you’re going through the same things, and you can relate to the song.  Which sums up to the point that you are not alone. Teen pop sensations,  rock kings, and RnB artists. When it comes to problems and situations, we all go through the same things, and when you know you’re not alone, it’s not that scary anymore. 

I guess listening to those songs that you can relate to helps you find clarity, and gives you insight on how to deal with things. It might not always be directly in the lyrics, but in the context of it.

I don’t know where I’m getting at with this post, so ending it here would probably be best.